CATHOLI DIOCESE OF NSUKKA.
A TALK BY HILLARY
TOBECHUKWU EZE (DAN~HILL) TO CYON DURING YOUTH WEEK.
TOPIC:
LUST IN THE NAME OF LOVE AMONG THE YOUTHS: THE WAY OUT.
Lust is one of the seven deadly sins according to
the Christian Bible, but it also come to mean a term of strong sexual desire as
a modern definition where few people are concerned with doctrine. ... Lust is
An Intense Feeling Where You are Extremely Attracted to A Person.
LUST
VS LOVE: DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE?
Lust is an altered state of consciousness programmed
by the primal urge to procreate. Studies suggest that the brain in this phase
is much like a brain on drugs. Researches illustrate that the same area lights
up when an addict gets a fix of cocaine as when a person is experiencing the
intense lust of physical attraction. Also in the early stage of a relationship,
when the sex hormones are raging, lust is fueled by idealization and
projection. You see what you hope someone will be or need them to be rather than
seeing the real person, flaws and all.
WHAT
IS LOVE?
Love
is when someone gives you what you do not have freely and not ask for anything
in return. Love is when someone follows you to cry when you are crying and
follows to rejoice when you are rejoicing. Love is when someone understands you
in your weakness or weaknesses. Love is when someone gives you hope when there
is no hope. Love is when someone gives you reason to laugh when the world has
made you to cry. Love is when someone gives you life, when there is no life.
Love is when someone gives you hope or reasons to live when you see no reason
to live.
Pure lust is based solely on physical attraction and
fantasy, it often dissipates when the "real person" surfaces. It is
the stage of wearing rose colored glasses when he or she "can do no
wrong." Being in love does not exclude lust. In fact, lust can lead to
love. However, real love, not based on idealization or projection, it requires
time to get to know each other. Here are some signs to watch for to
differentiate pure lust from love. Continue Reading.....................
HOW
TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LOVE AND LUST.
SIGNS
OF LUST
You are
totally focused on a person's looks and body.
You are
interested in having sex, but not in having conversations.
You had
rather keep the relationship on a fantasy level, not discuss real feelings.
You want
to leave soon after sex rather than cuddling or breakfast the next morning.
You are
lovers, but not friends.
SIGNS
OF LOVE
You want
to spend quality time together other than sex. Aristotle on friendship…….
You get
lost in conversations and forget about the hours passing.
You want
to honestly listen to each other's feelings, make each other happy.
He or she
motivates you to be a better person.
You want
to get to meet his or her family and friends. (Being proud about the love)
Have you ever wondered why God carefully positioned
a membrane of blood in a lady’s sexual opening? It is a tiny membrane that
partially or completely covers the opening of the vagina. It is called the
“HYMEN”. Why would God-Our Maker put a breakable tissue full of blood at the
very door of the sexual opening of the female? Why is it so carefully placed at
that entrance, like a ribbon tied at the entrance of a new house about to be
launched? Why is it filled with blood that spills away when it is broken? Why?
Without doubt, the HYMEN IS A GATE! It was God (our creator) who set that
blood- filled vessel there as a covenant blockage, a sign and a token of a
covenant between the bearer and whoever plunges into her opening. Before God,
the dis-virginity of a lady is not a casual act of fun. It is a serious
covenant struck and confirmed by the blood shed on that day. This is God’s way
of saying, “Whoever plunges into this woman shall only be able to do so by
making a blood covenant to be joined to her for the rest of his life, from that
point onward
Another challenge of sexual attraction is learning
to stay centered and listen to your gut in the early stages of being with
someone. This is not easy in the midst of hormones surging, but it is essential
to make healthy relationship decisions. Here are some tips to help you keep
your presence of mind when you are attracted to someone. This need not pull the
plug on passion, but it will make you more aware so you do not go looking for
trouble.
WATCH
FOR:
1. A little
voice in you says "danger" or "beware." Listen to it.
2. You have a
sense of malaise, discomfort, or feeling drained after you are together.
3. Your
attraction feels destructive or dark. Some attractions are dangerous.
4. You are
uncomfortable with how this person is treating you, but you are afraid that if
you mention it, you will push him or her away. Stand your ground.
Love
remains a complete mystery. Science has not been able to explain it.
Mathematics cannot predict it. Poets still wrestle with adequate words to
describe it.
It may have been more than two centuries ago, but Plato’s
words have never sounded more true, “Every heart sings a song, incomplete.” We
are all looking for love. At any given moment, we may be far from it but we
never stop hoping the next opportunity is just over on the horizon. We are all looking for true love.
A man who loves you will definitely want to have sex
with you! In fact, the deeper and more intense the love is, the more he wants
to consummate his love for you quickly. It is both a natural and a supernatural
order, once the mind is there, the body naturally follows.
The difference however between the carnal and
spiritual man is that, while they both feel and want the same thing, the
spiritual man has control over his mind and body and as such won't want to defy
or defile you. The natural man has no such control measures and is liable to
follow the direction of his erection.
So if you have been in that relationship for a while
and you are both keeping yourselves, don't assume that he is so spiritual that
he can't touch you and won't touch you. The bottom line is this: don't be
gullible to the extent that you believe nothing would happen, even if he can
speak in tongues from here to the pacific. And watch out for signs- of absolute
self-control and respect for you in the area of sex. I am not talking about you
affirming this by saying he has never had an erection near you, in this case
you even have to be sure he is not suffering from erectile dysfunction. In
fact, ask him to go and do a test if your church doesn't normally request for
it. Is it as serious as that? Yeah, it is very serious. Don't base your
findings on the absence of erection, let it be firmly assured by the
conditioning of his heart.
Is he a Christian brother? Watch out for the fear of
God in his life, that's what will keep and save you both. Look out for the
moment he withdraws his hands and keeps them in his pockets, look out for the
periods his breathing becomes heavy and he turns away momentarily from you,
look out for the times you are supposed to meet and he cancels your meeting,
look out for the fear of God and the restraining ability of the Holy Spirit. In
those moments, help him as you can- in demeanor and comportment, dressing and
carriage, words and conversations.
But most importantly, help him on your knees. Help
him approach heaven from your own end.
Are you thinking that is much work? Actually, the
benefit is more of yours than his.
SOME STEPS TO FINDING TRUE LOVE
1. Love
Requires You to Reveal Your True Self to Another
2. Finding
True Love Can Be Difficult
3. Your Need
for True Love Reveals Your Need to Be Loved Unconditionally
4. True Love
is Complicated by Our Self-Interest
5. Your
Search for True Love Begins with This Simple Prayer
"God,
right now I’m experiencing deep hurt and rejection. I realize that I have spent
much of my life trying to find love and value in the wrong places. I don’t want
to go on living like this. Forgive me for trying to find my own way. Forgive me
for neglecting You. I thank you that even before I was aware of it, You were
demonstrating Your love for me in Jesus’ death. I thank You that His death
offers me a way to know You and to experience Your love. God, fill my heart
with a sense of your love. Help me to realize that you are the source of my
worth and value. I trust you with my life and my broken heart. Heal it. Help me
to turn to you, and worship you. Amen."
Nothing
adorns a woman with as much beauty as purity! Nothing is more attractive than
holiness. Anyone can recognize this. I once heard of a group of young men who
called themselves the “Spur Posse.” They competed to sleep with as many women
as possible, but every one of them admitted that he wanted to marry a virgin.
They all recognized that virginity was a priceless treasure. Unfortunately,
they thought it was OK to sleep with the future brides of other men, even
though they did not want anyone to touch the women they would marry.
·
The most destructive habit……………………………………………………
Worry
·
The greatest Joy………………………………………………………….…………
Giving
·
The greatest loss……………………………………………….…………………..
Loss of self-respect
·
The most satisfying work………………………………………………….……
Helping others
·
The ugliest personality
trait………………………………………………….. Selfishness
·
The greatest shot in the arm………………………………………………….
Encouragement
·
The greatest problem to
overcome……………………………………..… Fear
·
The most effective sleeping
pill……………………………………..………. Peace of mind
·
The most crippling failure
disease………………………………………..… Excuses
·
The most powerful force in
life…………………………………………….... Love
·
The most dangerous act………………………………………………………….
Gossip
·
The world most incredible
computer…………………………………..…. The Brian
·
The worst thing to be
without…………………………………………………. Hope
·
The deadliest weapon……………………………………………………..………
The Tongue
·
The two most power-filled
words………………………………………….…. I can
·
The greatest asset…………………………………………………………………….
Faith
·
The most worthless emotion………………………………………………..….
Self-pity
·
The most beautiful attire………………………………………………………….
Smile
·
The most prized possession………………………………………………………
Integrity
·
The most powerful channel of
communication……………………..…. Prayer
·
The most contagious
spirit……………………………………………………..… Enthusiasm
·
Life ends; when you stop Dreaming
·
Hope ends; when you stop Believing
·
Love ends; when you stop Caring
We pray with Mary the mother of every youth to help
us on our journey towards heaven, so that all our efforts in this life may not
be in vain. We ask these and every other intentions we have through our Lord
Jesus Christ who lives and reigns in the unity of the Holy Spirit one God
forever and ever. AMEN. THANKS.
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