Nnam! Si mu dalu (Father! Tell me weldon) By Tobe Eze

Nnam! Si mu dalu (Father! Tell me weldon)

There are things we do sometimes consciously or unconsciously and they spoil things. These things are things that are very infinitesimal but when we do them, they amount to a very big problem. They kill the good spirit of work in people, they demoralize, they weigh people down, they even make people to be wicked, they also make some lazy, they can as well make people to be dubious and many other bad effects of it. We often quote Cicero, “Gratitude is the least of all virtues but when neglected, it becomes the greatest vice”, but to put it into practice is very difficult for us. The word “Weldon” can help to solve a very big problem that will follow it when neglected. Continue Reading..........

Some fathers, bosses, madams, Ogas, mothers, aunties and others in the position of authorities do take those under them for granted to a serious fault. They claim always to be unconscious of those around them and they will always like to please those who do not care about them. They dish out works to those under them as if they are not human beings. They will always claim that when they were in that stage, they were doing more than that when from every indication, they cannot do the least of those things they claim they know how to do. The lazy ones would always claim to be hardworking would claim to be training you. Hardworking ones would always like you to learn from examples they lay down. Telling a story of life experience can help to pin this down to us.
A father of four who is in the habit of this act will always dish out works to the children and go back to sleep. A day came when his children went to the farm to work, they worked from morning till afternoon. When they came back, their father was sleeping as usual. When he woke up, he called the first son and told him to arrange for cassava harvesting as soon as possible. Because the child knew he could do nothing to his father because of the nature of his father, he could only keep quiet and left the scene. That spoiled the whole joy in the family that they were enjoying before his arrival.
Another father in the same act did almost the same thing and the child retorted immediately “Nnam! Si mu dalu” (Father! Tell me weldon). That time, the father noticed that he missed the track but because of pride in him, he could not humbly say sorry rather, he shouted Dalu! Dalu!! Dalu!!! to the son and the son responded, “better”.
A mother in the same situation sent her son to accompany the daughter to the market for purchases. When they returned in the evening very tired, other members of the family who were around welcomed them and helped them to unload the goods. When their mother came out seeing them tired, what she could say was, “is it because of the market that you are tired like this? Even you Obinna is tired, what did you do there or is it the unloading of the goods that got you tired like this?” these words got the two children annoyed till the following morning and that affected the spirit that they use to work in the family.
It is high time we stopped this stupid behaviour of not appreciating those around us who work day and night to see that we are happy. We neglect those that should be so important to us and look for people who do not even know or care that we are existing to appreciate them. A contracted worker will come to work for us, after the work, we will call our household to offer the worker gifts that he/she has worked very well but our household that work not for money but to get things going, we neglect and relegate them to the dust.
That someone is under you does not mean that the person has lost his/her fundamental human right. The Bible we believe does not lie and it made it clear that whatever you will not like others to do onto you, you should not do it to another person, that is the golden rule (Matthew 7:12). We do not watch the golden rule but we will always like people to be work bulls for us.
Ethics condemns anyone from using a fellow human being as a means to an end but some of us are into it. Always thinking on what people would do for us and not what they could gain from us. Even when that is done, ordinary words of appreciation will not come from us, rather, we look for mistakes or errors to condemn the person. We are always right and those under us are always wrong.
Correction in everything one does is not a wonderful thing in training. In everything, you must complain and correct. Everything done by the person under you is carelessness and insensitivity and the ones done by you are mistakes. Sometimes, we have to overlook some things in order for peace to reign. No one on earth is perfect including you that thinks that you are always right and perfect. Do not see others as those on the wrong path always and you on the right path. Look back small and notice that you may be the one making serious mistake. You are not omniscience and omnipotence. It is only God that is perfect.
In all:
There is what I may call “correction in appreciation”. Even when you think that this person did not get this right and you have seen that the person worked, why not appreciate the person first and chip in the little correction and make sure your correction is not more than your appreciation? Correcting always make you a fault seeker which is very bad. A serious correction can be done in appreciation and no one may be be provoked but a little correction can provoke many because of the lack of appreciation.
This idea of being right always and the other being wrong always should stop in order to get things going.
This idea of complaining in every little thing should also stop to get things going well.
This idea of taking those under you as slaves and bulwarks should stop.
This idea of those under us not having human right again should stop.
This idea of not recognizing that people around you are not happy should stop.
This idea of pleasing people that are far and displeasing people who are near should stop.
This idea of comparing people that are incomparable should also stop.
If we want our homes to be in peace, all our fathers, mothers, Ogas, Bosses, Madams, Aunties and all those in charge of people should learn how to tell them “Dalu”.